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| Its been 2 weeks since baby and i've lost 30lbs, whoo whoo! Chicken diet is good for something! lol. I got 40 more lbs to go before i get back to the size i was prior to my princess. If there weren't so many eyes on me on what i can and cannot do, I'd be on the treadmill and doing pilates in the gym. However, everyone is monitoring me so I'll have to wait til the end of this month thing to workout. I'm so excited. I'd love to train for the twincities marathon in Oct again. I need something inspiring to get me back on track...i guess thats always been my secret to working out. Always had a trip or someone I was gona see to really push the extra mile. So anyway, for the time being I'm eating once a day. I want to lose all my weight(68lbs) by Sept. Plan to reunite w/ the dieters tea and treadmill very soon. On another note, I'd like to say that I'm so thankful for my health. My baby sister Becky recently has been noticing a lot of the Lupus symptoms. Its so sad. Father also found out he has kidney stones. So i'm truly grateful to be healthy and living strong. I can't imagine myself waking up everyday in pain or having to hold myself back from a lot of things because of my health. Now that Collins grown and I've matured, I feel so complete with my daughter. Its such a wonderful warm feeling. Hubby and I seem much closer taking care of the newborn and trying our best to fulfill collins need for attention. This is the life I've been waiting for and its actually reality! Gotta love it! Maybe I do want more kids after all?! haha..just kidding. I can finally say that I'm happy. 
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| Finally baby arrived May 23. It was a great experience. Labor was a peice of cake. I've had harder craps lol. Believe it or not, it only took me a day to recover, I didnt need any stiches and thanks to my mother, her herbal medicine healed me real good, no longer bleeding, boobs aren't even sore, and i'm walking around like i didnt even give birth. Dang compared to collin, this labor was nothing! I gave three big pushes w/o screeming and she came out NOT even making a nose. No cries. The doc/nurses were all so amazed how fast and quiet everything was. haha. Life has been different. Baby goes well with my sleepless nights. My only concern is when its late and she cries and cries non stop. I know its a phase the baby goes through, it jus scares me cuz u dont know what to do execpt mend to there cries. Other than that, shes an angel. Doesnt whin or cry at all. Big brother has been so happy about the little one. I allow him to help with everything...however I catch myself feeling bad cuz I feel like hes my personal slave. I feel even more bad when I catch myself yelling at him for stupid stuff....it makes him sad. I can tell he thinks I favor lil sis more than him. Then yet I feel bad cuz everything has or will change, less play time with him at the parks and doing projects together since my hands are full w/ baby. Ah...so i'm trying to figure a way to make it up and balance everything. No post depression yet. Husband works 7pm until 8am tomorrow morning...so i'm kinda scared and hoping baby girl doesnt give me one of those nonstop crying nights. I dont know how single mothers do it but I can't. Husband has been putting so much effort to helping me w/ the kids, cleaning, cooking, and taking em to the docs. Reality will hit me tonight. I'm scared. Need him by my side even if hes asleep. ahh.... 
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| So husband has been trying to look "good" lately. It's so annoying cuz he tries so hard lol. I'm def glad he took my advice on cleaning up, that "gangsta" appearance is like so 1997! Can't believe after impregnating me he wants to Lose weight and clean up. I think that was his master plan all along! He admits to it, urgh...wat a loser! Now I gotta work twice as hard to lose weight and get thin again.
Collins bday is coming up. Too close to divas arrival for me to plan something big like every year. I feel bad. What if I plan n diva comes out? Or if I'm in the hospital? Plus I'm on a tight budget this yr since there's so much to expect. Ahhh....
I've been attending Collins getting ready for kindergarten classes. We experienced his first school bus ride together. He was sooo amazed! I love doing kiddy stuff with him, it brings out the joy and happiness in me. Haven't decided if he'll be riding the bus or not, I rather send him every morning but I know I gotta give tough love n let him be a normal kid. Plus it's something he looks forward to. | | |
| It's been a long time since I blogged. I'm offically laid off work now, it's been about a week and Im feeling so lifeless. I spend alot of time with Collin but I find myself constantly bored and annoyed, aching in all sorts of places. Baby is due may 10th so anytime now...I wish she would jus come out.
I'm anxious to meet this little diva. More anxious for her to keep all of us busy and most important, I'm trilled to get back on track with my life before she came along.
A few things I like to say is that I'm thankful husband has changed. When I hear of other peoples marriage struggles, I honestly jus keep my ears closed and thank god we've over came the storm. There are plenty of things we got to work on but I'm glad to say the major diffulty has been accomplished. It was all worth it!
Then life goes on.
Since grandpa passing, my dad has been depressed but in denial. The doc gave him pills for it n he didn't believe he was depressed until he looked up the medication online. Oh father, we all love him so much. Seems like the only happiness is when he spends time with Collin. Even so, Collins mouth has gotten better n he'll ask father where gramps is at n stuff...n he'll get really teary eyed. Mother has been getting sick too. There aging! Sigh.......NO!
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| the shower was a success! i'm so lucky to have loving friends and family...even those from afar sent wonderful gifts. Looks like we are basically all set and just waiting for her arrival which is about 6weeks from now, May 10th to be exact. Ahhh....i hope time doesnt slow down now! On another note, I went to work yesterday and a BUNCH of people got laid off...me being one! Ahh..totally wack since I only have a few weeks before I pop, but it all works out well considering everything. I'm actually grateful to have a job and wonderful managers that kept me this long. I was only temping and wouldn't get any maternity bennifits anyway...but now that i'm laid off, i can actually collect unemployment! So it works out well! haha. God has something better planned for me. I have 2 weeks left at work and then 4 weeks of waiting for baby...i'm hoping to keep busy until she arrives. | | |
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